Should I see the baby ? Should I take care of the baby in the hospital ? Should I write the child a letter ? How will I feel about the adoption in six months ? In a year ? In ten years ? Will I be okay ? Will the child be okay ? The answers to these questions, and so many others that a birth mother might have, do not come easily. Most of the situations which arise during the adoption process are most unfamiliar, and little previous experience can be used as reference to guide the decisions that a birth mother now faces.
The adoption process probably requires expert counseling more than just about any other period of life. Just the rapid physical transformations make pregnancy difficult during even the best of times. Few other circumstances also involve so many conflicting emotions and thoughts tugging powerfully in various directions.
Counseling helps a birth mother find the right answers for her particular needs and goals, and to smooth the adoption process for everyone involved, including the adoptive parents and, ultimately, the child who will one day be affected by how the adults have dealt with the adoption process and each other.
Counseling is not required. Most birth mothers who take advantage of counseling, however, find it very helpful.